Lost

These past few days I can't even begin to describe how I feel. I feel happy, I feel tired, I feel sad, I feel disappointed, I feel lost. I feel like my life is out of my control and slipping through my fingers. How do you want something, but then your unsure if you want it? How do you walk away when all you do is second guess if you really need what your walking away from? How do leave knowing that you realize you need what you left, but they are no longer there? How do you know if the love you once had is still there? How do you begin to fix something that crumbles more and more everyday. How do you make such hard decisions. I don't know how to make decisions. I am the worst at them. I am famous for running away when things get hard. I wish there was someone that could just hand me the answers on a silver platter. yes my friends try to help, but they can't make the desicions for me or even tell me what to do. Whats meant to be will be right? I have to say I hate that saying. The waiting and the pain of getting whats meant to be is super hard.